Problem with Upgrading GirlFriend 1.0

Dear Sir,

Last year, I upgraded GirlFriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. No mention of such phenomenon was included in the product brochure.In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Karaoke-Hit 10.3 and Beerbash 2.5 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected I cannot seem to purge Wife 1.0 from my system. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 1.0 but uninstall does not work on this program. Can U help me?

Jeremy
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Dear Jeremy,

This is a very common problem men complain about is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is a " UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT" program. In fact, Wife 1.0 is an "OPERATING SYSTEM " and designed by its creator to run everything. It is impossible to uninstall, delete or purge the program from the system once installed.

U cannot go back to GirlFriend 1.0 because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install GirlFriend 2.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original system.

Look in your manual under WARNINGS. Alimony/Child Support. I recommend U to keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation.

Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might suggest U read the entire section regarding General Protection Faults (GPFs). U must assume all responsibility for faults and problems might occur. The best course of action will be to push the apologize button then reset button as soon as lock-up occurs. System will run smooth as long as U take the blame for all GPFs.Wife 1.0 is great program but is very high maintenance.

(PS - Do not attempt to install illegal program like Mistress 1.0 which is currently circulating both in the local and overseas markets. Such programs once detected by Wife 1.0 will result unimaginable damages and cost of repair may incur very high fee and time not to mention emotional distress....)

Give and take

A man is walking on the beach when he trips over a lamp. A few seconds later, a genie pops out and says, "I’m required to grant three wishes, but since you did not treat my lamp with respect, I will give twice what you get to the person you hate most—your boss."

The man agrees and makes his first wish: "I want lots of money." Instantly $20 million appears in bags on the beach, and $40 million appears in his boss’ bank account.

Next the man asks for an incredible sports car. Instantly a Lamborghini appears, and at the same moment, two show up outside his boss’ house.

Finally the genie says, "You have but one wish left; you should choose carefully."
The man says, "Well, I’ve always wanted to donate a kidney."

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Rich man

Two rich men were talking over coffee one day and one of them said to the other one "Hey I tell you my driver is really stupid... you don't believe?

Let me show you." and he called his driver Ah Beng over and said "Ah Beng, here is a 10 dollar note, go to the car showroom and buy me a Mercedes." to which Ah Beng replied, "Yes Sir! right away!" and rushed off to the showroom.The rich man turned to his friend and said, "See, I told you he was stupid."

The other rich man said, "That's nothing, you want to see stupid, I will show you stupid." and he called his driver, Ali. "Ali, go home now and check to see if I'm at home." to which Ali said, "Yes Sir, right away Sir." and ran home. "See what I told you? He doesn't even have enough brains to know that I cannot be at home if I am here."

Later on, the two drivers met on the road. Ah Beng said to Ali, "Eh, you know my boss is sooo stupid. He gave me 10 dollars and ask me to go to the car showroom and buy him a Mercedes..... Doesn't he know that today is Sunday lah, the showroom is closed!"

Ali replied, "You think he is stupid ah? My boss lagi worse, he asked me to go home to check if he is at home.... He got hand phone what, can just call up to check lah!!!!"